...meaning...

he continued his search..

as he walked and walked and walked..

uncertain of where he's heading..

observing and analyzing anything he finds intriguing or interesting in existence..

occasionally he stopped and study..

occasionally he thought he found a purpose and some meanings..

and he started dwelling into the things that builds meaning to his existence..

but sometimes it ended no where..

as the search continues deeper..

it potentially gets emptier..

perhaps justifying no resolutions..

perhaps not even justifying its existence..

despite his genuine interest and devotion to its existence..

he eventually discovered little or no meaning..

so he left despaired a little and continued walking..

until the next meaning reveals itself to him..


he couldn't understand why people easily accept things for how they are appearing..

oftentimes he tried to challenge the odds and prove a difference..

but only ending a little more tired and frustrated than others..

not exactly because it made met no ultimate purpose..

but it could be just that temporary to him and everyone else..

only to find himself searching again shortly..

before he even confidently summed it up with grace and a pride..


he thought he could make a difference..

he really believed he could..

but it seems he couldn't..


perhaps he really is living in his illusionary life..

he couldn't sleep for the past few nights..

even gazing at the ceilings for countless minutes in the middle of the night not even thinking anything meaningful..


perhaps meaning really doesn't mean anything..

perhaps he just needed a blissful smile that makes him feel worth breathing for another day..

perhaps he just needed to experience more diverse lifestyles to convince himself that life is meant to be an endless search for nothing meaningful until god signals to him that it's time..

probably he's just to conscious of his every breath..

which he shouldn't be..


so it is.

he shall take a nap and continue whatever tasks he is given and complete them the way everybody is expected.

let the mind dwell deeper only when the time is ripe.


take it easy boy.

he shall find truth and meaning soon. soon. meaning that only needs to mean something to you. don't be pressured by what happens out there.

to a doubtful existence. sincere blessings. =)