The Dreamer

i begin to wonder what it is all about..

that if i have set foot on the right path to get me to the place i set my goal on..

i seriously do not know if it is the path that i should be taking..

but i sense discomfort in my new nest..

just intuitive..

nothing solid to justify my doubts..

i was sold the idea of visionary and hopes..

or at least i conveniently sold myself a lie to comfort myself that it is for the better..

for better or for worse?

is it too premature to tell..

afterall my kpi was not yet listed and itemized..

however today's discussion draws a vague picture of mismatch between expectations of the superior and the one reporting..

there were no arguments..

there were no clear disapprovals..

no dissatisfaction of any certain degree..

but a stint of weary..

i couldn't rationalize the discomfort..

i just felt it.

in a rather certain manner..

that there wasn't a conscientious agreement.

that i was just a pawn purchasing a false hope of excitement
..
change is education.

change is vital and drastic movement.

and yet change is resistance in itself.

change is terror and horror in the face of reality.

change causes turbulence.

change disturbs harmony.

on the one end we strive to excel and command leadership.

on the other we fear the lost of temporary stewardship, the lost of stability, and the lost of consensus.

as if to believe is to disbelieve.

to change is in itself to resist change.

why is it so hard to accept a different approach all together?

it doesn't matter seriously..

it started making me wonder what's in it for me..

does it get me closer to you or further away from you..

does success breed serenity or peace of mind to live the life you have always wanted?

or strip you away of your fundamental rights to peace and comfort?

yes indeed we live not just for comfort but for purpose.

for faith, for belief, for the joy of fulfilling our destined potential..

there is nothing more fulfilling than seeing what you are capable of giving to mankind materializing before your eyes.

but it is one that you believe solely on your own..

occasionally in the journey you met 1 or 2 who shares consistent patterns of thoughts and faith in you..

but more than ever you met people who contest to your subsistence..

i really do not know what am i bragging now..

but i know i am not here to prove anything or to cause any turbulence that disrupt or threaten harmony to anyone..

afterall my purpose is to seek approval of me as someone likeable rather than competitive..

the journey of career often takes one into a position of command, respect and competence..

it is not my goal to get there..

i learned that i am a dreamer..

for as many or little dreamers you can run into in your life..

there is less than a handful that can stir the minds of others..

i can live in attempt to perfect all the weaknesses and uncomfortable shortcomings that come with me..

but it does not fulfill my short passage in this lifetime..

to understand and feel this tells me 1 simple conclusion..

that i am here a dreamer, destined to be making a living as a dreamer..

building dreams to the ones destined to implement dreams made-to-believe to them..

and i shall focus on building instinctive dreams..

no matter how lunatic, how stupid, or how naive they may seem..

it is who i am and what i stand for..

i sell dreams for a living.

what stands in the way of a dream seller is merely an obstacle to surpass with stronger conviction.