goodbye grandma..

i wonder what's the last thoughts that run through your mind before you decided to leave us..

i heard that you didn't talk much..

were you upset or satisfied after 90 years living..

were there anything particular that you want to say but refrained from saying..

any questions you wished answered..

anybody you wished to hug and say i love you and i'll always do..

do you still remember every single one of us and have very personal messages for everyone of us..

i'm sorry for everything i missed delivering up to promise..

i'm sorry i wasn't able to communicate with you and lacked passion to do so..

communication barrier shouldn't be the excuse i know..

humans can communicate with animals by body contact..

what more between humans that speak different languages..

probably i should have spent more time just holding your delicate hands and just listen and nod..

even if i really don't understand what you said and didn't try to..

i just wished you were happy up till the end of your days..

nothing much i could do now..

i knew you wanted to see my girlfriend and wanted to even have a chance to see us graduate and get married..

but i'm sorry i can't deliver that before you left..

i knew i promised to see you again the last round we met but i failed to see you again before you decided to leave us..

i'm sorry i didn't have the heart and sincerity to make sure i deliver my end of the promise..

i'm sorry i didn't feel the love you offered..

i'm sorry i am not a good grandson..

even my results were purely luck and yet you were so proud of me..

dear grandma..

i hope you're smiling now above us..

i hope you have journey after this..

love you forever..

love from your grandson and every one of us whom you once cared for..

goodbye grandma..